Tag Archives: guilt

The Mary Mac Show | Handling Guilt and Regret

The Mary Mac Show PodcastIn Episode 118, we look at how guilt and regret can affect us after a loved one’s death and learn how to help comfort and soothe ourselves.

Depending on the relationship you had with the person who died, there might be some guilt and regret you feel that needs to be worked through.

You might have wished you had more time to work through all the pain and conflict you had with that person. But that time never happened.

You might have expected that disagreements would have worked themself out.

Never did you believe you wouldn’t have the time to set things straight with that person or persons.

You always thought there would be more time.

But now they are gone, and that opportunity is now lost.

And you wonder what you can do for yourself to help you through this pain.

In this episode, I speak about various ways to help yourself through the guilt and regret.

Take the time to use the links to EFT in the show notes below.

And, especially, be kind to yourself.

Bless you my friend.
xoxo

Additional Notes:

As you know I am a great believer in the power of the Emotional Freedom Technique. Here are a few videos that I think will help you tremendously.

EFT Video on Guilt, EFT Video for Grief after Death of a Loved One.

If you need someone to chat with, don’t be shy. It’s totally confidential. Go to Crisis Connections page on my website MaryMac.info to find telephone numbers for Crisis Hotlines around the world.

If you need help finding people who will understand your exact pain, visit my Grief Resources page.

Visit my site MaryMac.info/books for additional help, especially my book Understanding Your Grieving Heart After a Loved One’s death, the first and best book to reach for as you deal with your grief.

You can obtain my free ebook entitled 21 Things You Must Know About The Grieving Process, available for immediate download right here on this site.

You’re welcome to send your questions to the Contact page on my site.

Please subscribe, rate and review on whatever platform you listen to me on! You can also go to www.TheMaryMacShow.com to choose a platform in the upper right hand corner. Then rate and review there! Thank you.

The Mary Mac Show | The Gift of Honesty

The Mary Mac Show Podcast

In Episode 114, we discuss the very difficult emotions we encounter when a loved one’s death caused extreme embarrassment for you and the family and how to release that pain so you can build a new life.

Perhaps your loved one was experimenting or deep in opioid drugs, heroin, cocaine, fentanyl. Maybe they have been involved in gangs. Perhaps driving while under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Involved in domestic abuse of their spouse or even decided to take their own life.

All of these situations are the direct result of their personal behavior and decisions they made in their lives.

And, unfortunately, they can bring great embarrassment to you after they have died.

In this week’s episode I delve in deep to the great pain you feel after they’ve died and left the mess they did for you.

To safe face, many families will not talk about what happened.

They will say things like they ‘accidentally overdosed’ or they will not disclose in their obituary how they died.

They will use words like ‘died unexpectedly’ but they never tell the entire story.

Now there are a lot of connotations to those two possibilities.

And it leaves people to wonder if the death was much worse than it really was.

A person could have ‘died unexpectedly’ in a car crash, heart attack, stroke, died in their sleep. So many ways. But none of those would cause the family to be embarrassed, now would they?

I guess I’m perplexed about how someone can ‘accidentally overdose’. They knew they were taking the drugs. They knew how much they were taking. They knew the risks involved with such powerful drugs. And when they reached out to a drug dealer, they knew they were putting themselves in great harm.

There wasn’t anything ‘accidental’ about it. And the possibility that they actually wanted to take their life using drugs still floats out there. But many families don’t want to entertain that thought.

When someone gets into a car and they’ve been drinking and drugging, they know the risk of killing others and themselves but that wasn’t their priority at that time. So when they kill others and themselves in that car crash, their family is devastated. Along with the family of those he or she killed with their recklessness.

If someone joined a gang, more than likely they had to prove themselves by killing someone, usually an innocent person. And then when they themselves are killed along the way, their family is embarrassed and distraught for what they did.

If a husband or wife is accustomed to beating on their spouse and this is a continual occurrence, and then one day they go too far and the battered spouse is killed, maybe to make the news in the papers, how difficult is it for the surviving family to endure.

Perhaps they took their own life, in so many manners – drugs, hung themselves, drove their car into a lake, stockpile, a huge truck. Suicide is not accidental by any means.

In this week’s episode I encourage survivors to get brutally honest about what really happened because if you’re still lying to yourself, you will stay stuck in your grief and not allow yourself to rebuild a life where you thrive.

So listen in to Episode 114 to learn ways to deal with this.

Blessings to you.
xoxo

Additional Notes:

If you are ill or grieving a loved one’s death, take the time to research a hotline with trained counselors to speak with.

The very best individuals to connect with are those who are suffering your exact type of death. Go here.

If my podcast has helped you, I’d love for you to buy me a coffee to show your support! Thanks!

The Mary Mac Show | How To Create End of Life Choices

The Mary Mac Show Podcast

In Episode 113, we consider the courageous act of developing an end-of-life plan for what we would like to happen should we become ill, unable to care for ourselves, or die and the decisions that need to be made so our families know of our desires.

It can be uncomfortable to speak with our loved ones about death and dying.

It can be even more uncomfortable when we need to speak about the specifics of what each individual wants for their end-of-life choices.

Many times it’s something dramatic that has taken place which makes us realize now is the time.

But please don’t wait until it’s so late that you don’t know what their wishes are.

Perhaps an accident or serious diagnosis wakes us up.

Yet what I encourage you to do is draw up the courage and speak about it now.

Would they want to be resusitated if they were at death’s door?

Would they not want to be resusitated and allowed to die as natural a death as possible?

Do they want to be cremated or buried and where?

Has a resting place already been chosen and paid for?

Do they want a wake and, if so, for how long?

Would they want a church funeral and, if so, where?

And have they developed a will? Who has possession of it and has an executor/executrix been named?

There are so many things that need to be considered for our end-of-life situation.

And the sooner they can be arranged and let others in the family know their wishes, the smoother their death will be for all concerned.

No, it is not easy getting these things in writing, but it is vital for a less drama-filled event after their death.

Bless you!
xoxo

Additional Notes:

If you are ill or grieving a loved one’s death, take the time to research a hotline with trained counselors to speak with.

The very best individuals to connect with are those who are suffering your exact type of death. Go here.

If my podcast has helped you, I’d love for you to buy me a coffee to show your support! Thanks!

The Mary Mac Show | Guilt After A Sudden Death

The Mary Mac Show Podcast

In Episode 110, we look at the guilt we feel when someone we love has died suddenly and how we can help ourselves release this pain.

Sudden death leaves us in shock and despair.

We never thought they would die when we least expected it or in the manner they did.

It may have been an medical event, like a heart attack, stroke, aneurysm.

It may have been an accident, like a car accident, dying in a plane crash, falling from the roof, hit by a car or other such dramatic loss.

It may have been horrific as in the case of murder, suicide, drug overdose, even terrorism.

Or it may have been a military, law enforcement, firefighter, EMT or other first responder death.

However your loved one died, a sudden death leaves us overwhelmed and unable to believe when, where and how they died.

In this episode, we talk about the ways we can help ourselves after someone we love has died suddenly.

Bless you, my friend. My warrior!

xoxo

Additional Notes:

Visit Crisis Connections at my website to telephone a trained counselor to speak with whenever you are feeling overwhelmed, confused, frightened, fearful or any host of emotions.

Learn the Emotional Freedom Technique here for Stress and Overwhelm. It will soothe you and calm you physically and emotionally. Also spend time in this guided meditation on Self Compassion, which we all need. Dr. Arianna also offers many wonderful tapping and guided-meditations to choose from based upon which is best for you.

You can watch Marissa Peer’s “I Am Enough” meditation.

Bach’s Rescue Remedy in the small yellow box is an excellent way to help yourself when youare overwhelmed. Just place a few drops on your tongue and relax. It doesn’t have alcohol in it, so if you are sensitive in this way, be aware. Available at your local healthfood store or online.

Treat yourself to a lovely gift from our Heart of Gold “I Remember” Products from The Mary Mac Store.

Remember, a portion of all proceeds help fund The Foundation for Grieving Children, Inc., the first national non-profit public charity which benefits children, teens, young adults after a loved one’s death which I established many years ago.

And remember to sign up for my private list below, so we can always stay in touch. Since social media is no longer reliable, please complete the form below so I can connect with you via email.

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The Mary Mac Show | Grieving a Miscarriage, Ectopic Pregnancy or Stillbirth

The Mary Mac Show PodcastIn Episode 97, we discuss the death of a baby through miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy or stillbirth and the pain, confusion and grief couples experience during these times.

When a couple first learns that they are expecting a baby, everyone is so excited.

It’s something they longed for and celebrate together and with family and friends.

But if they lose that baby through miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy or stillbirth, it shatters their world.

No one ever expects that something like this will happen.

Most people believe getting and keeping the pregnancy to full term is expected.

It’s easy.

Most women just go through pregnancy and they come home with a perfectly healthy baby girl or boy.

But the truth is many women will experience a miscarriage. Some even suffer through more than one.

It might be just a few months since they learned they were pregnant or it can be further along in the pregnancy.

And, even more devastating, is the stillbirth of a baby who is nearly or full term.

In this podcast episode, we discuss the grieving process of parents who are dealing with such sorrow.

Bless you my friend.
xoxo

Additional Notes:

As you know I am a great believer in the power of the Emotional Freedom Technique. Here are a few videos that I think will help you tremendously.

EFT videos for death of a baby through miscarriage, stillbirth, EFT Video for Grief after Death of a Loved One.

If you need someone to chat with, don’t be shy. It’s totally confidential. Go to Crisis Connections page on my website MaryMac.info to find telephone numbers for Crisis Hotlines around the world.

If you need help finding people who will understand your exact pain, visit my Grief Resources page and look under “Infant Death.”

Visit my site MaryMac.info/books for additional help, especially my book Understanding Your Grieving Heart After a Loved One’s death, the first and best book to reach for as you deal with your grief.

You’re welcome to send your questions to the Contact page on my site.

You can obtain my free ebook entitled 21 Things You Must Know About The Grieving Process, available for immediate download right here on this site.

Please subscribe, rate and review!

And I’d love your support of my podcast by buying me a coffee.

Thank you.