Category Archives: Sudden Death

The Mary Mac Show | Guilt After A Sudden Death

The Mary Mac Show Podcast

In Episode 110, we look at the guilt we feel when someone we love has died suddenly and how we can help ourselves release this pain.

Sudden death leaves us in shock and despair.

We never thought they would die when we least expected it or in the manner they did.

It may have been an medical event, like a heart attack, stroke, aneurysm.

It may have been an accident, like a car accident, dying in a plane crash, falling from the roof, hit by a car or other such dramatic loss.

It may have been horrific as in the case of murder, suicide, drug overdose, even terrorism.

Or it may have been a military, law enforcement, firefighter, EMT or other first responder death.

However your loved one died, a sudden death leaves us overwhelmed and unable to believe when, where and how they died.

In this episode, we talk about the ways we can help ourselves after someone we love has died suddenly.

Bless you, my friend. My warrior!

xoxo

Additional Notes:

Visit Crisis Connections at my website to telephone a trained counselor to speak with whenever you are feeling overwhelmed, confused, frightened, fearful or any host of emotions.

Learn the Emotional Freedom Technique here for Stress and Overwhelm. It will soothe you and calm you physically and emotionally. Also spend time in this guided meditation on Self Compassion, which we all need. Dr. Arianna also offers many wonderful tapping and guided-meditations to choose from based upon which is best for you.

You can watch Marissa Peer’s “I Am Enough” meditation.

Bach’s Rescue Remedy in the small yellow box is an excellent way to help yourself when youare overwhelmed. Just place a few drops on your tongue and relax. It doesn’t have alcohol in it, so if you are sensitive in this way, be aware. Available at your local healthfood store or online.

Treat yourself to a lovely gift from our Heart of Gold “I Remember” Products from The Mary Mac Store.

Remember, a portion of all proceeds help fund The Foundation for Grieving Children, Inc., the first national non-profit public charity which benefits children, teens, young adults after a loved one’s death which I established many years ago.

And remember to sign up for my private list below, so we can always stay in touch. Since social media is no longer reliable, please complete the form below so I can connect with you via email.

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The Mary Mac Show | Grieving an Infant Death

The Mary Mac Show PodcastIn Episode 98, we discuss the death of a baby through Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS), Sudden Unexpected Infant Death (SUID) or Infant Death where a child dies a few months or years into their life and how their parents and family deal with the unanticipated devastation of their loss.

Losing a baby to Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, known as SIDS or Crib Death, is a shocking loss as the child can be perfectly healthy, lays down for a nap or at bedtime and when the parent goes to awaken them, they have died.

No one expects that this will ever happen to a child under the age of one and it leaves parents wondering what could have happened, what they could have done differently, if any of this was their fault.

And the answer is that none of this was their fault and, often, even medical professionals cannot explain crib death.

A child can be perfectly healthy, but still succumb to crib death.

Another Sudden Unexpected Infant Death (SUID) is when a baby is accidentally smothered during the night when a parent leaves the child with them in the parent’s bed and they don’t realize that they rolled on top of the child suffocating it.

Or when a child is strangled by loose bedding or pillows wherever they have been laid down to sleep and cannot move those items by themselves to breathe.

Or when they fall through the railings of the bed and strangle themselves.

And there are also so many other ways infants die – car crashes, homicide, shaken baby syndrome, illnesses like cancer, etc.

Experiencing an infant death is devastating. It leaves the parents numb and wondering exactly how did this happen and often blame themselves.

In Episode 98, we talk about how to help yourself if you are grieving an infant death and how to deal with the reactions that family and friends might have which can also leave you bewildered.

Bless you my friend.
xoxo

Additional Notes:

As you know I am a great believer in the power of the Emotional Freedom Technique. Here are a few videos that I think will help you tremendously.

EFT Video for Death of an Infant, EFT Video for Grief after Death of a Loved One, How to do Surrogate EFT.

If you need someone to chat with, don’t be shy. It’s totally confidential. Go to Crisis Connections page on my website MaryMac.info to find telephone numbers for Crisis Hotlines around the world.

If you need help finding people who will understand your exact pain, visit my Grief Resources page and look under “Infant Death.”

Visit my site MaryMac.info/books for additional help, especially my book Understanding Your Grieving Heart After a Loved One’s death, the first and best book to reach for as you deal with your grief and How to Help a Grieving Child After a Loved One’s Death to help your surviving children.

You’re welcome to send your questions to the Contact page on my site.

You can obtain my free ebook entitled 21 Things You Must Know About The Grieving Process, available for immediate download right here on this site.

Please subscribe, rate and review on The Mary Mac Show website or Apple Podcasts!

And I’d love your support of my podcast by buying me a coffee.

Thank you.

The Mary Mac Show | Creating End of Life Choices

The Mary Mac Show Podcast

In Episode 91, we discuss the courageous act of developing a plan for what we would like to happen should we become ill, unable to care for ourselves, or die and the decisions that need to be made so our families know of our desires.

Talking about our end of life planning is not something that most of us considers.

It is uncomfortable and quite frankly, we usually don’t know where to start, even if we decided it was something that we should do.

Most times, something dramatic has taken place which stirs us to consider that it would be a wise decision to do so.

Perhaps someone in our lives died suddenly.

Perhaps someone has a serious diagnosis that might be terminal.

It is at these times that dealing with the subject of death becomes more relevant in our lives.

That’s not to say we like it. Absolutely not.

Most of us find it abhorrent that we need to deal with this issue.

But at some point, and hopefully sooner than later, we take on the uncomfortable task of thinking about a will, a do-not-resusitate order (DNR), a living will, and possibly a trust so that our loved ones will understand our wishes when our life nears its end.

In this episode we talk about these legal documents and help you start to engage in these difficult tasks that need decisions and must be attended to if you want your loved ones to know of your desires.

The last thing you want is to leave behind chaos when you die. It causes stress among the family members who must sort out what they think you wanted versus what you did want.

So please take the time to listen in to Episode 91.

Don’t be afraid of this difficult topic. You and your family will be so grateful you took the time and energy to lay out your wishes before you leave them.

Bless you!
xoxo

Additional Notes:

If you are ill or grieving a loved one’s death, take the time to research a hotline with trained counselors to speak with.

The very best individuals to connect with are those who are suffering your exact type of death. Go here.

If my podcast has helped you, I’d love for you to buy me a coffee to show your support! Thanks!

The Mary Mac Show | Conversations About Death and Dying

The Mary Mac Show Podcast

In Episode 90, we discuss the importance of speaking about death and dying preferably long before imminent death is upon our relatives and loved ones.

There is no doubt this is an uncomfortable topic, but one we need to discuss.

In this day and age, we have no idea when terminal illness and death will visit ourselves or our family.

And since so much is uncertain with variants of a virus that has consumed so much of the last year and a half, not to mention how the vaccine has killed people, we live in a specifically uncertain time.

It is true that if we didn’t have to deal with this, we wouldn’t.

It is uncomfortable.

Many people find it hard to talk about death and dying.

We’d rather leave it up to someone else.

But don’t let fear stop you from truly connecting with someone you love during the end days.

Sometimes death comes very quickly and it would be sad if you hadn’t had a conversation around death long before it ever occurred in your relationship with them.

If you had this conversation when they were well, or when they were diagnosed with an illness, you would capture a very wonderful connection with them.

There would be no regrets.

You would have said all you’d like to say to someone who meant so much to you.

We don’t know what the future holds these days. Life is so fragile now.

Take the time to think about this.

If it’s too sensitive to speak all you want to say aloud, do so in writing.

Either way, your soul will be at peace and no matter what happens in the future, you are settled.

Personally, I am thinking about writing out letters to the most important people in my life to acknowledge those who have helped me, loved me and let them know how grateful I feel to have them in my life.

With all that’s happening in this world, we could leave this life in an instant.

Use the time you have to make a difference.

Love you.
xoxo

Additional Notes:

If you are ill or grieving a loved one’s death, take the time to research a hotline with trained counselors to speak with.

The very best individuals to connect with are those who are suffering your exact type of death. Go here.

If my podcast has helped you, I’d love for you to buy me a coffee to show your support! Thanks!

The Mary Mac Show | Death of a Spouse

The Mary Mac Show Podcast

In Episode 82, we discuss the challenges we face after the death of our husband or wife and how widows and widowers struggle to build a new life.

Widowhood is, by far, one of the most stressful and overwhelming losses we can experience.

Whether we have lost a husband or wife who was with us for a few years or decades, the relationship we shared with them was, more than likely, the most intimate one we had in our lifetime.

They spent more time with us than any other person.

While we feel a great bond to our children, our spouse is the one with whom we started our adult journey before our children were born.

And when they become adults and move onto their own lives, it is our spouse who is still next to us to live the remainder of our days.

Even if we divorce and remarry, that person is the one we share the majority of our waking hours with, apart from working.

We wake with them.

We go to sleep with them.

We enjoy all sorts of experiences with them.

They are our best friends who listen to us when we are sad, confused, angry, frustrated.

They hold us when we cry.

They console us when we are hurting.

They are our confidante, unlike any other.

So when they die, we are devastated.

And recovering from our grief is difficult and a long-term process.

Listen in to Episode 82 to learn what happens at the beginning of widowhood.

And remember, when it becomes overwhelming, do reach out to grief counselors at hotlines (see below) to listen and console you.

Sending you my love. xoxo

Additional Notes:

Visit Crisis Connections at my website to telephone a trained counselor to speak with whenever you are feeling overwhelmed, confused, frightened, fearful or any host of emotions. Even if it is a suicide hotline, do not think they cannot help you. You do not need to feel suicidal to speak with these wonderful counselors. They are there to listen to you.

I encourage you to find support groups for widows and widowers by searching online for “widowed groups” in your city/town. They usually meet a few times each month at the local church, senior center, hospital or hospice in your area.

Use the Emotional Freedom Technique for Healing.

You can watch Marissa Peer’s “I Am Enough” meditation.

Treat yourself to a lovely gift from our Heart of Gold “I Remember” Products from The Mary Mac Store.

Remember, a portion of all proceeds help fund The Foundation for Grieving Children, Inc., the first national non-profit public charity which benefits children, teens, young adults after a loved one’s death which I established many years ago.

And remember to sign up for my private email list so we can always stay in touch, since social media is no longer reliable. Receive my ebook 21 Things You Must Know About The Grieving Process for immediate download.

xoxo